How To Release What No Longer Serves You

Posted on: January 27, 2015 Category: Own Your Power

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Getting clear on what no longer serves me continues to assist me greatly in my commitment to the process of spiritual maturation and personal mastery.

Sometimes, the reveal of what no longer serves me comes painfully into my awareness.

Thankfully, often times – I am made aware of what these elements are through a deep knowing that a piece in my life is out of alignment (with my truth).

With the intention of being completely transparent and honest, here are some of the things that I have released which were no longer serving me … and the process of how I have released them.

My intention is that you will gain awareness around what no longer serves you in your current formula – and perhaps you will identify with some of the ones in my previous formula. ;) 


What No Longer Serves Me:

+ Living in fear of judgement.

“Can I really do this thing I really desire to do? What will she say or think – oh gosh, how will she react if I actually did it?”

In that process I have found myself waiting to live my life fully, waiting for permission that only I had the power gift myself, and mostly – living someone else’s idea of what my life should be (and not what I desire my life to be).

+ The “I have to” energy.

You know what I’m talking about …. I have to do this for him/her/them. I HAVE to. I have to explain myself/help them/do this thing that I really have no desire to do if I am being honest …

The truth is, “No. I don’t have to do anything for anyone. I choose to – or I can choose not to.” Moving from obligation energy to taking personal responsibility for my personal choices has drastically decreased resentment within me and increased joy, beauty, and wellbeing.

+ Hiding, not living my truth fully and beautifully.

The quote “Beauty equals truth and truth equals beauty” always resonates so deeply with me when I talk about truth and hiding. I believe that a big reason of why so many women struggle with feeling beautiful is because we have been conditioned to hide and disconnect with our truths – and in the process of self-rejection – are disconnected with our beauty.

The more I express my truth and commit to my journey of living my truth fully in all areas of life (unapologetically), the more beautiful I know I am, and feel.

+ The need to please others.

From a proving energy, let me show you how capable I am. No…. this doesn’t serve us. When we are in this energy, no matter how much (or little) external validation we receive, a deeper void exists. What we are seeking is self-love and self-honouring, in a way that only we can gift ourselves.

+ Extremism.

Another post on this because there is so much more to say…. I am an extremist, and yet at times, I know the “all or nothing” energy doesn’t serve me. I am definitely a work in progress in terms of embracing balance and swinging less from each end of the spectrum. Balance is beautiful. ;)

+ Tolerating overstepped boundaries.

Tolerating what we know (deep down) we are not available for is deeply related to self-worth. You are worthy (by default ;) to have your boundaries upheld.


3 Steps to Release What No Longer Serves You:

1. Trace it back and journal around the person you will be if you release this.

Where did this pattern stem from? Tracing back to the stem and root of issues often help us understand why we have been operating unconsciously. Often, these patterns served us in the past.

Of course, It serves us until it no longer does. Until the conscious awareness that it doesn’t serve us grows to a tipping point where we will (and can) no longer revert back to being unconscious.

Journal, visualize, connect with who you will be when you release this non-serving piece. How does it feel – beautiful? empowering? free? Often it will connect us to our core values on a deeper level, which is exactly why it is such an important piece in our journey.

2. Set an intention to release the pattern (and recommit to it daily).

When we set an intention we invite experience and opportunities in our life to fulfil the intention. When remind ourselves of our intention on a daily basis, we start reprogramming old patterns into consciously created empowered belief systems. Set an intention, write out what you choose to release and commit to it daily.

(Tip: I also love harnessing the energy of the full moon to further commit to what I am choosing to release (that being said, now is as good a time!).)

3. When we are creating new patterns, we often find that we require to create powerful boundaries (and uphold them) – especially around people who already know us.

Powerful boundaries are boundaries you put in place from a place of self-love, and boundaries that YOU can uphold.

For instance, you realize you’re no longer available to be in conversations that are negative as they aren’t conducive to your wellbeing. You may choose to say “When the conversations turn negative it really affects my emotional wellbeing, so when they become negative I will choose to exit.” This is a powerful boundary because you can walk away from talking to the person.

Another example is you may say: “When the conversations turn negative it really affects my emotional wellbeing, so can you please lovingly refrain from talking negatively?” This is not a powerful boundary because you are powerless in this situation because the boundary has to be upheld by the other person.

4. Finally, repeat as required.

The more we repeat a process and experience, the more we allow something to become our new “normal”.

How do we know we’ve made progress? I’ve found that I will often be cast in a similar situation as before, and now I will have more awareness – in fact, I will have the opportunity to choose how to respond.  (In other words, it no longer becomes a reactive scenario. It now becomes an opportunity to choose to live more beautifully, more consciously, and more the way I desire to live.) – Which is the whole point, right? ;)


In the comments below: Tell me, what are the things that no longer serve you that you are ready to release. If you have your own tips on how to release patterns that are non-serving, please share them below too!

Looking forward to hearing from you!

Love,

jiani

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Reviewing The Year: 2014

Posted on: December 25, 2014 Category: Reviews

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2014 has been such an incredible year – to say the least.

From fulfilling and maxing out my guiding words for the year, to the magical moments that have unfolded this year … I’m reflecting on all that have transpired in 2014, below.


My Guiding Words for 2014

Every year I carve out some time to reflect on what I desire to create and experience for the year. It’s an intuitive, heart-centered, intent-filled process that I adore.

For 2014, I had these three words scrawled front and center on my vision board.

The 3 words of the year, preceeded by ‘I AM':

Freedom. Love. Success.

The freedom to travel, to live the life I love, to experience my desires, to make choices – to be who I am. To be Love, to have an abundance of unconditional love in my life, and to love freely. And finally, to embody and experience success on my terms, and what my definition of success was.


Success On Your Own Terms

What does success look like to you? I believe we all have different definitions of ‘success’ and defining them clearly can assist us in tuning into the goals we are truly aligned with – which of course, makes achieving these goals a lot easier and straightforward!

For me, success in 2014 looked like: Completing my final year of being full-time at university and graduating with a minimum of 75%, travelling to places that lit me up, continue running my business and coaching clients, being in a beautiful relationship, and being surrounded and supported by people who are committed to their dreams.

I also made a decision in December 2013 to take on an international life and business coaching certification course to further master my skills as a coach and serve my clients on a higher level. Success meant arriving at 31st December, knowing that I have fulfilled all of the above.

And Wow – 2014, you’ve over-delivered. :)


Travelling to My Heart’s Content. Living The Life I Love.

March: Los Angeles

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2014 started with a luxurious trip to LA as part of my coaching certification, where we stayed in The Ritz Carlton, Marina del Rey. I learnt to say ‘YES’ to my desires – and take a stand for them, no matter what. I learnt that when a woman has made the decision to have something no matter what, and she says ‘YES’ to her desires, the Universe ALWAYS finds a way to fulfil and deliver.

I met my coach and learnt so much, met clients and colleagues from all around the world (in person, finally!), and also finally met with past coaching client and friend Polly Alexandre. I roomed with Polly (and little did I know then that we would continue to have many more adventures together).

Finally, I learnt that I really enjoyed being in beautiful and luxurious environments, further adding that to my intentions and desires. More of that in my life, please!


April: Bali

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A leisurely trip to Ubud, Bali with my sister, where we filled our bellies with lots of organic and yummy food, enjoyed luxurious massages, practiced yoga, and were blown away by the genuine and kind spirit of the Balinese people.

Bali – you were incredibly beautiful and I can’t wait to return! Next Bali spot I’m being called to explore: Uluwatu.


June: Paris

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I jetsetted to Paris in June for the next live coaching event. I hosted an in-person intensive with a go-getting client (who then went on to create her first $20k month!), learnt more about wealth consciousness, how to show up as a the empowered feminine in relationships, and deepened my mastery in the art of coaching.

Paris always expands my reality – the beauty and joie de vivre. My inner Frenchie adores all of Paris!


A Parisian Photoshoot

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Paris has such a special place in my heart. And I knew that one of my desires for 2014 was to have a photoshoot in 2014 with my photographer Wendy.

It was an empowering experience of asking for what I envisioned the photoshoot to look like, working with a creative visionary photographer and makeup artist, and falling in love with my photos afterwards. I wrote more about the power of asking for what you want, here.


July: Ibiza

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When Polly invited me to Ibiza I knew it was a definite YES! A week of beautiful oceanic views, dancing nights, and deep conversations – tied up with a day of synchronistic shopping and lounging at a beach club.

I’m so grateful for the experience – from learning to trust unconditionally, friendship, cherishing beauty, and learning to embrace beauty in my life.


September: Sydney

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The next stop for my coaching certification training would bring me to Sydney.

I got to arrive a few days early to visit my sister in Sydney AND enjoy an incredible time with my mentors and friends. I then arrived back in Perth to a pleasant surprise from Steve!


In Between: More of Australia

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I got to see loads more of Australia this year.

From enjoying trips to beaches, swims in the ocean, and day-outs exploring … I fell in love with sunny Australia – even more deeply so! I’m so excited for another year of living in Sydney in 2015!


November: Graduating & Completion

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Ahhh, November started with my plate filled to the brim AND ended with relief. It marked an incredibly powerful month of work and completion. I completed university the way I had intended to, coached incredible clients in their businesses and lives, moved out of my apartment, as well as completing my coaching certification course.


December

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In December, I celebrated Christmas in Brisbane and the Gold Coast with my love.

Ocean swims, champagne, beaches, fun in the sun galore – the perfect place to be to start dreaming big about 2015, while soaking in the beauty and goodness that is 2014.


The Themes & Lessons of 2014

1. I’ve learnt every travel experience and investment inevitably makes me richer – in all senses of the term ‘rich’. Every place I have travelled to allowed me to walk off full of inspiration, more growth, and even more of understanding of who I am – what I believe in – and what I intend to create more of.

2. There is a season in life for everything you desire. Honour the season that you are in right now and fully experience and complete those seasons by being present (and very patient) – it will be yours to have.

3. Always always always say ‘YES’ to your desires. State your desires and let the Universe deliver.

4. Create space for your visions to manifest.


Wow! What a year it has been!

Thank you for celebrating the year that was 2014 with me – and being here every step of the way.

Share below: What are the magical moments of your 2014? And what are you going to step into in 2015?

(Professional photos by Wendy Yalom. Other photos taken from my personal Instagram.)

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